Transgender in the South

“A lot of people think it’s a choice, and it’s not a choice.” This is the mentality that Hayden Gates of Tupelo, MS is trying to instill in the minds of many Americans.

At first glace, Hayden Gates seems like your average run-of-the-mill guy who enjoys spending his spare time with his wife, exploring Facebook, and texting close friends. Once you learn a little more about Mr. Gates, however, you will find out that he leads an extraordinary life. Hayden is transgender.

The last several years have been monumental for the LGBTQ movement. With the Supreme Court’s Ruling in favor of Same-Sex Marriage over the summer, there is no doubt that progress is being made in favor of this organization.

While there is still a long way to go, a portion of this community has recently been catapulted into the spotlight when Caitlyn Jenner, an Olympic Gold Medalist and reality television star, came out as transgender during a television interview with Diane Sawyer.

Although the transgender topic has turned into a sort of media frenzy, the South has remained relatively quiet on the controversial matter. Cathy Titler, a member of Pass Christian Mississippi’s Conservative Council considers the issue to be “taboo” and “a bit of a problem when its comes to conservative morals.”

With this in mind, people such as Hayden are trying to erase stereotypes and educate the population on what it really means to be transgender. Gates notes that by telling their stories, the transgender community hopes to “get the conversation started on an issue that is so much more prevalent than people think.”

Hayden faced adversity early on in his life. At a young age, Gates was adopted into a “decent family”. He reminisces about his childhood in a loving, but almost distant way, as if he has left that part of his life far behind him.

As a young girl, Gates always new that she was different from most other people. “My mom kept putting me in dresses, and making me grow my hair out, and I wanted short hair and to wear pants.”

At around the age of 20, Gates enlisted in the Marines. During this time, being transgender was relatively unknown to a majority of people, expect a select group of psychologists. Because of this, Gates considered herself to be a lesbian.

Between the years of 1994 and 2011 “Don’t as, don’t tell” (DADT), United States’ policy that prohibited openly gay persons from serving in the military, was strongly enforced. For a while, Gates was able to keep her sexuality classified , until her roommates eventually caught on and reported her.

After being reported to their commander, Gates was forced to lie about her sexuality in order to prevent being dishonorably discharged from the military.

The belief that Gates was a lesbian remained with her a majority of her life. This all changed once she started discussing how she felt with her wife.

At this time, Gate’s wife had a transgender friend, and started telling her friend how Gate was feeling. From what he was told, the friend concluded that Gates was transgender.

Gates’ wife relayed the information back to her then girlfriend, and that’s when “everything started making since”.

After going through a year of counseling and therapy, Gates was ready to start hormone therapy. Although Gates is extremely satisfied with the outcome of the hormone therapy, he admits that the daily process of injecting himself with hormones can become exhausting.

With that being said, Gates “feels more comfortable than ever” now that he is recognized as a man. Although there is still much progress to be made, Gates hopes that “by getting (his) story out there, people will become more excepting” towards the entire transgender community.